Reflections On A Semester At Home (You're Gonna Hear Me Roar)

I like to be in control. This is a good and bad thing. I also love to have a plan when it comes to my life. In middle school I knew I was going to go to high school. In high school I planned to go to college. Last year at Samford I planned to be there for four years. When I left last year for the summer I planned to return in the fall and live in the Chi O house and be a normal college kid.

My plan didn't happen.

After reflecting on this past semester this was God smacking me back into my place. So often I think I'm in the drivers seat of my life and my plan and forget to look to God. I thought my semester at school was where I needed to be. It was what I was going to do. God at a different plan and it was so much better than my own.

My parents and I stood in the hallway upstairs by the computer and made the decision that I was going to stay home for the semester. I had missed too much school and my brain just wasn't getting better. My dad said that I should stay home. My mom cried and I just stood there. I was slightly relieved that a decision had finally been made and I wasn't going to be in limbo anymore. I stood up, got in the shower and cried. I let myself have a minute of anger and then I didn't cry about it again for the rest of the semester. Then I accepted it and decided to make the most my time at home.

The next day my mom and I were driving home from therapy and Roar by Katy Perry came on the radio. My mom knew that I loved this song so she cranked it up, turned to me and said, "This is your semester theme song." I smiled and sang as loud as I could. I thought, "UM DUH YOURE GONNA HEAR ME ROAR THIS SEMESTER."

Then we got Leo. I didn't really have any friends at home and he became my therapy and companion. Oh man I miss my puppy. Alli developed her dog voice which makes us all laugh/want to hurt her.

I got so many cool opportunities this semester. One of them was being able to help out at the Heartland Film Festival. Their office is in Fountain Square so it was fun to explore my own city. I was able to meet so many cool people in the film industry. During the festival I got to work for Deliberate Media and hang out with Hannah and Katelyn, two of the coolest people ever.

I was also able to travel. I went to Spokane, Washington. I have wanted to go to Washington and this semester was the perfect time. I also went to Nashville, Indiana University, and Birmingham .

I saw concerts: Sigur Ros (yes I cried and my heart stopped for a second), Youth Lagoon, and The Head & The Heart.

I was able to live life with my family for the semester and it ruled. We had family dinners, watch The Biggest Loser, played with Leo, did yard work and just hung out. I was able to have one more semester at home with my sisters. We talked about boys and fought and laughed and did the dishes and went to the Selena Gomez concert and celebrated birthdays.

I made a lovely new friend, Emily Lorentz. Lydia Smith and Mary Raine came to visit. Also, in state college kids come home way more often than I thought.

I hung out with my babies a lot. Okay, they aren't MY babies but they are my baby cousins. I didn't know that it was possible to love kids as much as I love those four. They have a special place in my heart. Marco started talking and one night when I was putting him to be he said, "I wuv you Emmy." I don't think anything will ever beat that sentence. We played in the snow together and did crafts and put up the christmas tree and moved them into their new rooms and did ballet in the living room and watched Pacers games and ate dinner and laughed a lot this semester. I miss that.

I was able to do a lot of little things that I have been wanting to do for so long but haven't had the time to do it. I have a chest full of keepsakes that I was able to organize and I finally made my tshirt quilt. I went over to Aunt Janey's and we organized the basement and did loads of laundry and just hung out and laughed.

This semester was unconventional and hard. It was weird and awesome but ultimately God was in control. He had this semester planned long before I even got my concussions. I wouldn't trade being at home for anything.